Beach Red
by Jemppy
Summary: Will's first raid leaves a lingering sense of doubt in is mind. Jack and a bottle of rum set out to show him that his feelings aren't so unusual.


Author Note: Okay here is another one-shot. This is a strange one and Jack wouldn't shut up during the writing of this. It was inspired from an Evanescence song, "Tourniquet" In the song there is a line that says "I am pouring crimson regret/ and betrayal" Well whenever I heard it, it sounded like "I am pouring crimson regret/ and beach red" well that gave me a weird sense of inspiration.  
  
Dedicated To: My Nor Nor who pushed for me to finish this.  
  
***********  
  
"What a wonderful day of pillage and plunder! Don't ye agree mate?" Jack stood proudly with his chest puffed out and hands planted firmly and proudly on his hips. He surveyed the deck from his position near the helm. The fruits of their latest steal was spread all around while Anamaria, acting as the quartermaster of the ship, divided up shares.   
  
Will stood silently next to the proudly stanced pirate. He didn't look nor feel happy, just held a look of disgust on his countenance.   
  
Jack spared the silent boy a glance and his grin dropped. Rubbing the back of his head he laughed lightly, "This is where ye agree wit me, whelp."   
  
Will shook himself out of the self-induced reverie and gave the captain a sheepish look. "Ah, sorry, Jack-"   
  
"Captain, that's *Captain* Jack."   
  
Nodding Will continued on. "Yeah, sorry 'bout that 'Captain' Sparrow. I was thinking." He returned his look back to the division of the spoils.   
  
Jack raised an eyebrow. "You be thinkin' now? Why break a habit of a lifetime and start thinkin' now?"   
  
"Hah." Will mumbled and went back into his thoughts. Jack stared at the boy a bit longer before giving up his sudden delve into the world of thought process to an effect of too much of a good thing. Getting as much prize as the Pearl had just gotten off of that Spanish Galleon was clearly a good thing. Jack jumped down from the quarterdeck to the main deck area and flashed his grin to his second mate and his quartermaster.   
  
"Gid'day Ana, Gibbs, I do hope you gave me the larger portion of the equal share." He slapped his arms around Anamaria and Gibbs' shoulders, grin never leaving his face.   
  
Will watched the eccentric captain swagger around and basically interfere with everyone's attempt to count their share. He had to hide a smile at the pirate's antics but the smile soon slipped from his face and he once again fell into that brooding silence.   
  
He had told Jack the truth when he had said that he had just been thinking. The Black Pearl had silently sneaked up on an unsuspecting galleon and attacked with all her glory. The fight had been a brutal one, seeing as the Spanish galleons came armed to the teeth and not a particular chance of a quick surrender. Will had watched Jack swing manically from a rope that was suspended from one of the yardarms and land directly in the middle of the fray without a care in the world for his person. He had seen the captain hack and slash and otherwise kill a majority of the surprised Spanish.   
  
Will had stayed back and had swung his sword in order to disable and not kill. But there had been one man that seemed so intent on his action of removing Jack Sparrow's head from his shoulders that Will had felt a curtain of red dip down to cover his eyes and an anger so sudden and swift that he himself did not realize that he was stabbing the Spaniard over and over again. Even though it was clear that the man was dead from the first blow.   
  
Jack had just calmly placed a hand on Will's sword arm and gave him a knowing grin and moved on to the next death. The crew of the Pearl was determined to get that bounty.   
  
And it had been a great one indeed. Will's first raid since rejoining up with Jack and the Pearl. And as he thought longer about it, it had been Will's first kill.   
  
His first murder.   
  
Sure he had fought a crew of the un-dead and he had delivered blows that would have killed them if they were alive but that was it, after seeing them in the moonlight, he knew that they could not be killed, so the more violent the blow, the more time he had to get away. He probably killed some of them when he had shed his own blood onto the Aztec cursed coin, but he had not seen it and he had no idea for sure. He had just brutally slain that Spaniard without a care in the world. That man had threatened Jack, and though the pirate didn't really know it, Will had saved him by cutting the attacker's life off.   
  
Now he was flushed with guilt.   
  
"You're gonna make one shoddy pirate." he whispered to himself as he idly watched Jack make a first-class ass out of himself by placing a golden tiara on his head and waving about a jeweled scepter. The man was completely impossible sometimes.   
  
But as always his thoughts returned to that man. The dark eyes so intent on his objective of killing the captain of the ship that had brought death to his own. The brown skin that turned red under the his own crafted blade. The coarse hair that too, was lost in the blood that poured forth.   
  
Will ripped himself back from the quarterdeck rail, clutching at his head. Trying to push the memories out of his mind. Trying to forget the images of that man dying beneath him. How did the others live with this guilt all the time? How was he going to live with it and continue on the Pearl?   
  
He was still holding his head when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Looking up, he met the concerned kohl rimmed eyes of a tiara wearing captain. "Ye okay, mate?"   
  
Will just stared blankly at him. Jack gave him a confused look and attempted a gold filled grin. "Will, luv?" he questioned again, letting the term of endearment hang between them.   
  
Nodding, Will tried to push back the feelings of guilt and self-loathing. "Yeah Jack, just a bit sea sick, that's all."   
  
It was then that Will realize that he had fallen into a crouched position next to the deck rail and that Jack had now wrapped his arm around him, pulling him close.   
  
"Just sick?" the skeptical look was still thrown off by the ridiculous tiara perched on his head.   
  
Will rubbed at his eyes and nodded again. "Yeah, sick."   
  
There was a derisive snort and then the arm around him disappeared as Jack straightened up and looked back down at his crew. "Carry on you dogs, me and my first mate are gonna retire to my bonnie bottle of rum in me quarters, savvy? Ana you got control." he ignored the wink that the dark woman threw at him.   
  
Jack turned his attention back to his first mate. "C'mon, Will," he reached a hand down and pulled the dead weight up to his feet. "We got some talking we need to do."   
  
************   
  
The bottle of rum broke open with a define hiss and a release of bubbles. Jack lifted the bottle to his lips and smiled. "Is there not a better way than to celebrate the capture of the pirate's best prize: The Spanish Galleon, than with a bottle of rum?"   
  
Will sat on the other side of the table that resided in the captain's room, not really paying any attention to the pirate or his poison of choice.   
  
Jack glared at Will. "Again you missed yer cue to agree wit me." he took a large swallow from the bottle and slammed it back down on the table between them. The loud noise startled Will out of his thought.   
  
"Oh, sorry again."   
  
"Don't tell me you been thinkin' again, eh?"   
  
"Yeah..."   
  
"Well shit Will, three weeks away from yer lass and you start this thinkin' bit. I still recall those good 'ole days where you'd be out there in the front doin' the first thing that come to yer head, not bein' one to think actions through or consider the opportune moment." Jack rested his elbows on the table and leaned forward, his face close to Will's. "What be botherin' ya? Ye can tell 'ol Jack here. Er...'ol Captain Jack." he amended himself.   
  
Will realize that he could smell the rum on Jack's breath and strangely enough, he wasn't disgusted by it. "I just...."   
  
"You just.....?" Jack gestured erratically with is hands. One stray hand almost knocked over the bottle of rum.   
  
His face flushed red with shame and he dropped his eyes so not to meet Jack's dark ones. "I just feel guilty..." he hurried on with his sentence as he looked up to see Jack's raised eyebrow, "..what with killing that man."   
  
Realization filled Jack's face as his mouth dropped open. "Ohh!" the look was replaced by a grin. Propping his boots up onto the table he gave Will a reassuring look. "I see. Having first killin' regrets, eh luv?"   
  
Idly noticing the second use of the term 'luv' Will nodded slowly. "Sorry, Jack, I know you must think of me as a child and I swear I will try and get over it but I can't stop-"   
  
Jack held up a hand to stop the flow of the words that rushed from Will's mouth. "Now why do you be thinkin' that I think of ye as a child?" Jack looked honestly confused and not unlike a child himself as he stared over his boots at the red face Will.   
  
Will blinked. "Because I am acting unseemly for a pirate."   
  
It was Jack's turn to blink. "Unseemly? Unseemly is a word that the higher-ups reserve for the likes of us, not a word were describe our own with. And besides mate, we all have our first kill regrets. It just be natural, that's all."   
  
So the image of the dying man's wide dark eyes that still hung on to his mind like some devil-sent barnacle was normal? "Did you have it too?"   
  
Jack nodded, jingling the tiara which, strangely enough still resided on his head. "You bet I did."   
  
"Can you tell me about it?"   
  
Leaning up and putting his feet back down on the floor, Jack reached for the bottle and took a long hard drink. "There," he sighed after he swallowed, "yeah I can tell you the story. So sit back and take a drink, this be long ago..."   
  
//Jack's story//   
  
"It was really a while ago. Guess I must have been killin' for awhile. Hmm kinda a strange thought, huh? Well anyway, this story begins on a British ship. Now don't look at me like that, I wasn't caught or anything, I was actually a cabin boy on this fine brig.   
  
"Yes that was the kind of ship. It had the same name as the prison of the ship and I tell you that sometimes that ship felt just like a prison itself. Unlike my Pearl that is. But it was an okay ship I guess. It had two masts and a lovely bowsprit. I remember being as I believe I was, ten at the time, staring up at the huge main mast and wondering if I could ever climb up to the main royal yard like the rest of the sailors could. I used always get in trouble for climbing the ratlines in attempt to reach that royal yard-"   
  
"Will you just get on with the story Jack? I don't care what the ship looked like."   
  
"Alright, alright, just got stuck in me memories. Well this was a British merchant ship named the Beach. Incredibly stupid name if you asked me, but being that cabin boy, I didn't have much of a say on what we named her. But the Beach? Why in the seven hells would you name your ship after an action which you'd never want your ship to befall? To beach your ship is horrible. Either that or why would you name it the Beach when it would always be in the Sea? Makes no sense to me, that be for sure."   
  
"Jack...."   
  
"Sorry. I got a bit off topic there, didn't I? Well yeah, back to me story. The captain of this fair, badly-named, ship was the gent known as Captain R. J. Fisk. He was a hard bastard, pretty much everyone on the ship hated 'em 'cept fer me. Dunno why 'xactly I liked 'em at first. Guess he treated me well and he was one of my firsts."   
  
"Firsts......"   
  
"NO! Eck, no, no. Not that first, no, one of the first men to treat me nicely and not like the scum off the bottom of his shoe. Took me under his wing, he did. Now obviously you just thought that his intentions with me were impure, but no, it wasn't like that. He did want me for a certain reason. He wanted me to spy on his crew. See, he suspected that a mutiny was a brewin'. That man could recognize the tell-tale signs of a mutiny, that he could."   
  
"You mean unlike you, right?"   
  
"Will, you stop interupting me, Will?"   
  
"Sorry...."   
  
"Will you Will?"   
  
"Hehe."   
  
"What now?"   
  
"'Will you Will', you could say that sentence backwards and forwards. There has gotta be a name for sentences like that."   
  
"Fine, no more story. Looks like you feel all good about bloody torturing that poor bloke back there on the galleon, you did know that you only need to stab 'em once and put 'em outta his misery, and not stab 'em over and over again so he laid there choking on his own blood and in a haze of pain....seems you got over that fast, mate."   
  
"......that was low, Jack."   
  
"Do you want me to continue or not?"   
  
"Yes, please."   
  
"Okay then. I was as good a cabin boy as there could be. Alright don't look at me like that, I didn't do much other than clean after Fisk. The crew cared little for me. I was just 'Little Sparrow', Captain Fisk's little tell-tale bird. They hardly let me near the forecastle crew quarters. Fisk kept it no secret what he wanted me to look for.   
  
"I hardly had any understanding on what I was looking for. But Fisk knew that his men didn't like him. He knew that they thought him too cruel for simple merchant crossings."   
  
"Was he a pirate then?"   
  
"He was not. Just a right bastard, aye he was. He drove those men to the bare bone. And if one slowed down, or took a break, he would whip them. Even I was on the receiving end of the strip of leather."   
  
"I've seen those scars."   
  
"Aye, aye, well the crew hated him, and rightfully so. But I was naught but a kid. So in fear of the whip, I listened to him."   
  
"I thought you said he was kind to you?"   
  
"He was, he just didn't tolerate laziness. Okay on with the story. One day we were making that crossing to the Caribbean when I was ordered into the crew quarters to retrieve something or other and then I saw it. A round robin. It is a piece of parchment that lists the names of crew members that agreed to a mutiny but were written in a circle so that no one name was at the top of the list. I didn't know what it was back then, but I did know that Fisk wanted me to report it.   
  
"However, a crewman, a certain William Turner caught me. He knew I saw something that even though I didn't understand it, I was gonna report it. He stopped me. Promised me something he did."  
  
"What did my dad give?"  
  
"Several colorful beads and an offer of friendship. Bill was a smart kid, not that much older than me, really. He could see that I was just a tool for the Captain, and so he offered to be my friend for the voyage. In exchange that I not be tellin' old Fisk about the robin. I agreed. And Fisk never heard about the robin.........at least not from me.  
  
"As it were to be Fisk did his own searching on his own time. And he found the parchment naught but two days before the mutiny were to take place.   
  
"He ordered all hands to the deck. He lined us up and paced before us. I was confused. Now that I think of it, I must have been one idiot of a young whelp."  
  
"Not much has changed."  
  
"I was an ignorant fool, much like yourself back then."  
  
"I'll keep my mouth shut."  
  
"Good lad. Well he announced that he knew of the evil plot. Not a single sailor blinked at his relevation. They were good liars, that crew was. Well their silence only did to piss that captain right off. He fumed and ranted about laziness and injustice. But they kept their mouths shut all the while he demanded whose idea it was to start the round robin. Finally the 'good' captain cracked.  
  
"He demanded that the crew atoned for their crimes against him and against God. He would pick at random one man and punish him, torture him until dead because of what the crew had done. And he did choose. He choice your father.  
  
"Something snapped in me then. This man, this captain who had taken care of me, was about to kill the one man that befriended me on the trip. True, old Bootstrap only put himself in that position to protect the crew, but he had grown to see me in the same way that I saw him. A friend.  
  
"It was a strange and terrible feeling. I was torn, but me body made the decision for me. You see the captain was a paranoid man, as you could tell, and he kept a knife on his person at all times. And as his cabin boy, I knew this. So while me mind debated this terrible situation, my body lunged forward, pulled the knife from its sheath and stabbed Fisk repeatedly.  
  
"I came back to me senses when Bill pulled me off of him. Me white shirt was drenched in blood and gore, I had the stuff dripping down me face. It was in me hair and in me mind. After the red had drained from me vision, memories leaked back through. Like seeing the captain's eyes widen as he saw an attack from the least expected person, the one he trusted, I swear to this day, I saw that look of betrayal in them. I can't forget it, no matter how many rum bottles I consume."  
  
"That's how I feel."  
  
"I know. That's why ye shouldn't be feeling guilt and all shamed like. It happens to most people. Even me, and I'm heartless! Now pass me that bottle."  
  
**********  
  
Will stared as Jack tossed his head back and finished off the rum. The pirate leaned hunched over the table, with an iron grip about the bottle. Throughout Jack's story, he had listened, albeit interrupted several times, to the intense tale. He had seen the look in the pirate's eyes as the story drew to the close. There had been a hollow look, like some of the life had drained from them.   
  
It was only for a moment, but Will had seen it all the same.   
  
"You saved my father's life."  
  
Jack nodded, staring blankly at what seemed like Will's left ear. "Aye, I did."  
  
"Well then think of it this way then, next time you feel guilty, if you hadn't of killed that captain, he would have killed my father and I would have never existed. And never met you." He crossed his arms and gave the captain a pointed look.  
  
"You're right." Jack straightened up and grinned. "And I wouldn't be having this grand adventure with Bill's son!"  
  
"Whatever happened to the Beach?"  
  
"Well, the crew voted that I should be captain after Fisk's death."  
  
Will rolled his eyes. "Yeah right, you were how old?"  
  
"Ten, but I be telling' the truth! But seeing as I was young, Bill Turner stepped in and filled the captain role, only 'til I'd get older, ye see. Then I'd resume the duty, since the crew elected me."  
  
"And the Beach?"  
  
Jack smiled again, "We never did decide to return to port and give up our goods. The crew decided that piracy was the better course, and I whole heartedly agreed. Well On one voyage, the Beach came under attack from a British convoy. We were heavily damaged. In fact, so much, the ship needed a complete overhaul. Many said we should just get entire new ship. But both me and yer father were attached to the old Beach, so we rebuilt it, painstakingly. There were so many new parts that it would have been bad luck to sail under the name of the Beach."  
  
Will watched as Jack's smile grew larger. "And?"  
  
"I renamed her. The Black Pearl." 


End file.
